ninjaotta:

methoticalmemento:

Best host ever!!

i think i cracked rib from laughing omg

(via jackbaracumquat)

kin-sei:

Lord and Saviour

kin-sei:

Lord and Saviour

(via industrial-illusions)

oldroots:

im on a mission to make the security guard the most unlikable guy in the world

(via industrial-illusions)

futurefantastic:

zacwells:

futurefantastic:

zacwells:

How long does your ideal hug last

38-45 minutes

that’s really impractical

u said ideal, not realistic

(via pokemonsnapofficial)

40ozhoe:

cheefkief:

40ozhoe:

me cause football right around the corner 

Wow. Tumblr is supposed to be a sanctuary, a safe haven, even, for alternative lifestyles. Not for high school jocks interested in the most common thing ever. Seriously, football is exactly the kind of thing someone joins tumblr to escape from. Stop watching football and go join a fandom, or delete your account.

Signed, a proud football-hating SuperWhoLockianStuckSwimmingOnTitanPotter fan.

NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

we takin’ over 

(via cybertinkerhell)

gnarly:

when your teacher asks u why ur late to class

image

(via pokemonsnapofficial)

flannel-penguin:

beamkatanachronicles:

also who’s ready for ‘so i herd u liek mudkips’ to return from the ashes of the meme underworld

image

(via pokemonsnapofficial)

Why do white people own so many pets?
Because we’re not allowed to own people anymore.
*****
What is the scariest thing about a white person in prison?
You know he did it.
*****
how many Chicago cops does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black.”
*****
A good looking 50 year old white man is trying to get laid on reality TV. What show are you watching?
To catch a predator.
*****
Why do white girls travel in groups of three or five?
They can’t even
*****
What do you call 64 white people in a room? A full blooded Cherokee.

from various reddit threads

at dinner last night, a coworker was talking about hanging out with his white friends and getting fed up with the racist jokes, and asked them to tell a white people joke.  nobody had any, so he googled and found these. after a few of them, people were a lot less comfortable.

white folks, next time you hear a racist joke, maybe lead with one of these in response.  tag this “I’m white” when you reblog it, if you are.

(via cuterpillar)

(via fracturedcock)

smutlinson:

just use this excuse any time you don’t want to go to school

smutlinson:

just use this excuse any time you don’t want to go to school

(via tallmanvanitas)